The biggest question you need to ask yourself in your 20’s

Define yourself radically as one loved by God. Every other identity is an illusion. Brennan Manning

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. 1 John 3vs1-3

I cannot overemphasize the number of 20something’s who are either depressed, stuck in jobs they hate, nervous about the future or simply tumbling with the tumbleweeds of life without a sense of direction whatsoever.

The complexities of being a young adult in our contemporary society are real. No matter how grounded you are in your faith, there’s going to be a season when life is just too difficult to cope with.

The social pressure for women…

The social pressures that affect men and women in their 20’s are often different, but the effects are the same. Women feel the pressure to look and appear perfect. They spend their time and money in trying to maintain the right look, maybe with the hope of attracting the right guy. They struggle with having to embrace their own sexuality in a world that objectifies them. They have the added pressure of starting a family before the clock runs out whilst trying to figure out their own career paths and future.

The social pressure for men…

Men too suffer from many social pressures. They struggle with trying to find who they are and what they are passionate about. In a society that’s highly materialistic, men feel the need to own certain things in order to feel accepted. Hence many young men in their twenties invest so much time buying things they don’t need in order to be accepted by people they don’t like.

“The very things we thought would make us happy, often leave us feeling sad and miserable.”

The most important question

The most important question you can ask yourself in your 20’s is not “what” but “who” defines your identity. That question has the potential to answer all the other questions you could possibly ask about yourself. It answers the kind of values that define you, the direction your life is going, and who is totally in control of your life.

Like the woman at the well, it’s a question that can be answered when we truly seek God to reveal to us who we are.

The sad news…

The sad news is that the majority of us, seek our identity in the wrong places most of the time. We often search for it in romantic relationships. We end up with with the wrong people, hurt and rejected. In trying to cover up the pain, we invite the next wrong person and the cycle goes on and on again.

Social media also makes it more difficult to know who we are. With it’s deafening noises, we become influenced by people who have no idea who they are themselves.

Education doesn’t solve it either. The majority of us are miserable in our day jobs, whilst our certificates hang on our bedroom walls. And how many of us can confidently say they knew who they were after obtaining their tertiary education?

The Good news…

The Good news is that our identity is found in Christ and in knowing that he loves us no matter what. If you think about it, everything else is like a shifting shadow. Our job titles are here today and gone tomorrow. How I look and what I have is nothing compared to knowing that I am a child of God.

The greatest lie of our time is that we need to have something, look in a certain way and be someone in order to be accepted. The good news is that God accepts us the way we are and that he alone is the source of our identity.

Reference verses: John 6:27, John 1:12, Colossians 3:12, Galatians 3:26-28

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